Monday, January 28, 2019

The Longing - It's A Thing

(You can find more thoughts and tips On Being Divorced, by clicking on the link to the right of the page. Thanks!)
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When I began blogging eleven years ago, I had no idea what the future would hold. Obviously, none of us do, but we still hope, pray and plan for our specific ideal. I knew that The Calm One and I would be married and serving the Lord with three children here on earth and two in heaven. Because that was what life looked like then.

Sometimes even the surest of things change. And change they did, six years ago. If you've kept up with my intermittent posting between sponsored posts, you know I've been divorced. They are six of the longest, yet very short stack of years I've ever lived through.

I think I've been fairly successful in not letting my marriage status define me. I sometimes forget that someone divorced me, but I never, ever forget that I am not married and do not have someone to share life with. To parent with. To lay in bed with fingers intertwined and laugh at inside jokes. The dream was snatched from me by two people who put their desires above the good of everyone else involved.

And there were many involved. Our children, of course. Our parents, siblings, extended family members and friends were all suddenly thrown for a loop. All of us had to maneuver through this new, unfamiliar territory.

Don't we all crave someone? Someone that will be a witness to our life? Someone to bathe our gaping wounds with their tears of compassion? Those wide, open chasms of hurt to be filled in with sweet words? Someone we can do the same for?

I realize that's a fairly romanticized view of marriage. I'm not naive enough to believe everyday of marriage could be described that way. In fact, I know those days are few and far between because life gets busy. Kids need raising. Jobs need to be completed.

But on the days that are just too much, and though your head knows God is near and in control, a person sometimes needs arms around them. To hear that it's going to be all right and you'll get through it together.

Should I ever get to experience these things again, I will never take it for granted.


Joyfully,

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