Saturday, June 20, 2015

On Being Divorced - part 6



I see the effects of my divorce in the eyes and actions of my children every day. They are strong, resilient but at times so vulnerable and fragile. I weep even now for the innocence they no longer have. 

Much in their lives is met with the wariness of old souls and they always hold back emotionally. My youngest is the only one who still shows any kind of physical affection, but in the business of growing up, he's drifting further and further from the childlike enthusiasm for hugs and kisses. 

The kids have lots of friends and are growing into their own in a way that I am proud of. I pray daily for the Lord to grant grace where there are gaps to be filled in. Some days those gaps loom large. Many other days I can see His hand and am grateful and humbled all over again. What a great God to serve. I have known joy and liberty I never thought possible. I am still learning to let go of the rigid standards I thought I needed to live by and embrace the freedom Jesus offers. Being the oldest child myself, this is an uphill battle. But worth the climb.

My continual prayer is that my children find their peace, their security in the Hand of the One who loves them more completely than I ever could.

And for me, that is a very joyful thing,

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